BEAM 8 STAR BLEND (750ML)

EYE
Orangish Copper

NOSE
Grits before cooking, sourness, boiled peanuts, rubbing alcohol and a new sponge. This is not a delicate dainty thing; it’s an ugly beast.

PALATE
Everclear mixed with 7-UP, dried corn, dried wood and an overall essence of rubbing alcohol. It tastes like rubbing alcohol smells, the aroma has permeated all of my senses.

FINISH
Short dry burst of toothpicks, everclear, dried corn and 7-UP.

BALANCE, BODY & FEEL
No balance, thin body and a watery feel.

OVERALL
Complex, interesting, nuanced, delicate and tasty. These are not words that could ever be associated with Beam’s Eight Star Blended Kentucky Whiskey. This whiskey is all manner of weird, but not in a good way; it smells and tastes like Old Crow mixed with Everclear and 7-UP that’s been wring from a sponge.

When Bukowski wrote about buying or stealing cheap whiskey Beam’s Eight Star, and it’s related blended American ilk, is what I think of. He’ll name Old Grand-Dad, Old Crow and others, but when he’s talking about the cheap stuff, whose only purpose is to get you messed up, he calls it “cheap whiskey” (which it is). The alcoholic poet mixed the cheap stuff 50/50 with water to make it more drinkable and it’s easy to see why.

The “overall” section of my handwritten notes just reads “Oh no… no… just no.” So kids, just say no to the Beam’s Eight Star. Unless you’re mixing it with Coke. It might work in that… or it might ruin your Coke… it’s likely to ruin your Coke. Cheers?